Just won't do!
by the Sayjin Kira
Summary: Edward and Alphonse Elric have returned home through the gate. Edward has changed and frankly, Roy Mustang just can't stand it! Warnings:Malemale love. Movie spoliers. Eventual RoyEd. cursing.
1. Shock

**JUST WON'T DO.**

Edward Elric was gonna get it.

Somewhere in the four years that he and Alphonse had been missing in the other world Edward had become immune to all forms of teasing and taunting that General Roy Mustang could throw at him.

This did not sit well with the General.

Now that the government was elected by the people, and Roy had far too many black spots in his past to even think of running for Prime Minister, Roy found himself slipping in to an easy, normal, happy life.

It was boring as hell.

Sure being a General was great. It had its kicks, ordering people around, intimidating the masses, the fact that women flocked to a powerful man.

But Roy had found that being content was exceedingly dull.

Then Edward had show up again.

His clothes ratty and strange, his hair in a messy blonde ponytail, he had staggered into Roy's home and life, and asked, ASKED, for Roy's help.

As if his appearance alone hadn't been shocking enough.

After Days of questioning by the new government and military court, they finally accepted the answers Edward was willing to give but Roy knew it wasn't even close to the real story.

The real story, well, they just didn't need to know.

A week passes, and life had become a whole lot more interesting for Roy Mustang

Here he was again, in his office, on a Monday but today was different from any other Monday in his office.

Across from his Paperwork coated desk sat Edward Elric, in a military uniform.

"Wow Edward you certainly have gotten … wider" Roy waited for the anticipated out burst

"And you've gotten older General Mustang." The blonde imp replied a smirk gracing his lips.

The General smiled, folding his hands and resting his chin on top of them. "Really? I am surprised you can tell form all the way down there."

"You shouldn't be, after all I'm rather young in comparison, and age hasn't affected MY eyes yet."

An obsidian eyebrow rose, almost as if in challenge.

"Some men are like fine wine, they get better with age, and others just never GROW up."

Rich laughter filled the large office. It was bright and vibrant, seeming to bounce of the walls.

The General blinked in surprise, watching as Edward composed himself. The laughter had reached his eyes; turning those strange orbs to molten gold in his mirth.

"Some things never change, do they?" Edward asked. He looked up smiling like the cat that got the canary. His eyes darted to the clock on the wall.

"I have to be going, good evening General."

Roy blinked, then again, then one more time.

"What just happened here?' He asked his empty office.

Edward Elric had gotten the last word. Not only that but he hadn't cursed, screamed, yelled or even fumed, not in the slightest.

Roy was genuinely baffled. This person looked like Edward, sounded like Edward but didn't act like Edward.

Where was the fire? The temper? The passion that drove the young man in his earlier years?

Sure, Roy expected Edward to grow up a bit; to mature; it was only natural. Even for some one with such unnatural god-like abilities.

But this lack of reaction had to be a fluke.

But it turned out not to be.

No matter how crafty his insults were, no matter how masterfully he weaved his teasing, he could not faze Edward.

And that just would not do.

author's note: Please review and give me honest, constructive critisim. I'ma novice at this and just looking to improve my writting skills in general and have fun while doing it!


	2. The plan formulates

**Just won't do.Chapter 2: The plan formulates **

**Warnings: Language.**

**Disclaimer:I do not own FullMetal Alchemist. The Characters just run around in my head boinking eachother and distracting me from my work.**

**The plan formulates**

Edward Elric did have a weakness.

It took Roy awhile to figure it out, and at first he wasn't sure.

So he tested his theory, and liked the results.

Oh yes, Edward was going to get it.

And this would do quite nicely.

General Roy Mustang sat at his desk, the same desk he sits at every monday trying to devise even more creative ways to slack off while papers keep stacking up on his desk.

His office had two rooms now, the outer offices where, Breda, Havoc, Falman, Hawkeye and Furey did there work,  
and the inner office with it's huge mahogany desk, supple leather couch and fantastic window view.

It was really quite in there.

And right now quite equaled boring to the General.

"Where is the bastard!" The General heard shouted from some where in the outer office by a very familiar voice.

"Calm down, Edward." Came the smooth reply. "General Mustang is in his office. When you go in would you please in form him I am going to lunch?"

"Yeah, sure Riza. It's better if there are no witnesses anyways." Ed chackled evily.

Riza tried her best to give Edward a reprochful look, but she had a soft spot in her heart for the small blonde alchemist.

Besides, Mustang was a bastard. And Edward kept him on his toes.

Riza hated to think about how Roy had been when Ed had been gone. The dull lifeless look in his eyes that had taken up residence along with him up in the snowy north still haunted her.

But with the Elric brothers back the General had come back to life, that twinkle in his eye that had made women swone and men follow him to the ends of the earth returned.

"Thank you Edward." and with that Col. Hawkeye spun on her heels, headed out the door and down the hall way.

Several angry stomps lead Edward to the inner office door, which he slammed open with out so much as a warning.

The General sat at his desk. Hands clasped, chin resting on top and a grin plastered on his face.

These little angry displays were oh so entertaining to Roy.

"How the hell am I supposed to give you any decent results when my researh and development budget is a absolute joke?" The short blonde huffed, hands on hips and leaning forward. His face not inches away from the General's own swmirking facade.

The General shrugged "I have faith in you, Fullmetal." His smirk widened.

Edward grabbed the front of the Generals uniform Jacket and leaned in even closer, "Listen here bastard, I don't have time to fuck around. Now do something about my damn BUDGET!"

"Has anyone ever told you, what a beautiful mouth you have Fullmetal?"

The smaller Alchemist blushed, the rosy color starting at his cheeks and soon over taking his whole countanace.

Fourtunalty for Ed, he recovers quickly. He released the General and backed away from the still seated man.

"What the hell does that have to do with anything?!"

The flushed fugure of one Fullmetal was not lost on Roy.

"It dosen't have to do with anything, it was simply an observation. With you in my face it's hard not to notice how pouty your lips are."

Ed's blushed deepened now spreading down his neck. "M..M..My lips are not pouty! Girls have pouty lips!"

"Yes girls, and YOU, have pouty lips. I bet all the woman around here are jelous of how pretty your lips are."

"MY LIPS ARE NOT PRETTY!" The blonde shreiked, red as a tomato at this point.

Roy swore if he looked hard enough, he could see steam coming off of Ed.

After several moments of arm flailing and huffing, the Fullmetal alchemist turned and stalked out the door.

A grin split the Generals face from ear to ear.

"_So the twerp can be shaken up, this should be fun" _Roy thought to himself, leaning back in his chair and resting his arms ont he sides.

At that moment Havoc chose to walk in but upon seeing the genuienly malicious look on his commanding officer's face he turned around with out so much as a word and went right back out the way he came.


	3. Brothers and couch confessions

Just won't do!

Chapter 3 – brothers and couch confessions

Warnings: Um, cuddly Elrics and mushy brotherly feelings? I think there might have been a curse word or two in there.

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. I only borrow it.

Edward stared long and hard at himself in his bathroom mirror. Slowly a finger came up and plucked at his bottom lip.

"It is not pouty_." _The blonde alchemist said to his reflection.

A knock on the door brought Ed out of his sulking "Brother! Hurry up I need to pee." Yanking the door open Ed looked out sheepishly at his younger brother.

"Sorry Al, it's all yours."

The younger Elric knit his brows together giving his older sibling a strange look before moving past him into the bathroom.

Ed looked around their humble abode. The apartment was small, it really only had three rooms, four if you counted the bar counter that separated the living room from the kitchen.

Not for the first time Ed lamented the lack of space. He loved his brother dearly but it was getting harder to share such limited space with him. They had both already managed in there short time back to amass a collection of books that was competing for space.

And Ed found he could just not get enough alone time. It's not that he couldn't just go somewhere else if he wanted to get away from Alphonse, but what he needed was some personal alone time.

Like when he needed to deal with how Mustang made him feel when he said things like "you have a beautiful mouth".

It was silly, and really he shouldn't have overreacted so badly. Let it affect him so badly, but, when Roy had said that it had made him melt.

And the only way to keep from turning into Jell-O in front of the man was to get angry at him, to twist his words and turn them into and insult.

A large warm hand on his shoulder broke Ed out of his thoughts. "Brother what's wrong?" The Younger Elric turned his sibling towards him and rested his other hand over the flesh shoulder of his sibling.

"You've looked lost in thought ever since you got home and you keep staring at yourself and playing with your lip what happened today?" Concern shown through steely blue eyes as they locked on to golden ones.

"It's nothing Al, don't worry about it." Ed moved to turn away but the hands on his shoulders clamped down harder.

"It's not nothing, you would be over it by now if it were nothing. Please tell me brother, you know you can tell me anything and since we have been back I've had this feeling that you've been hiding something from me."

The worry in his younger brother's eyes melted any resolve Ed might have had to keep this to himself. He felt the tears begin to well up, threatening to spill over so he quickly buried his face against the taller boy's chest and held back a sob.

"Brother," The younger man's arms came up to wrap around his crying sibling. "It's all right, let it out, just let it all go." He rubbed soothing circles on the shorter blondes back.

"It, it's…I... It's just so hard!" Ed cried out, sniffling and wiping his nose on the shirt in front of him. Alphonse chose to ignore this disgusting lack of manors, even though it was REALLY gross, and he could see a little snot trail drying on his shirt.

"What is so hard Brother?"

"Being…being near HIM every day. Being so close to him but… but not."

"Him? Who do you mean Brother?"

"THE BASTARD WHO ELSE WOULD I MEAN?" The smaller of the two howled and pushed away.

"Brother, do you mean General Mustang?' Why is it so hard to be around hi…Oh."

Alphonse approached the trembling form of his older sibling, embracing him from behind, pulling the shaking form to his own and resting his blonde head on a cold steel shoulder. For some reason the feel of Ed's auto-mail was comforting to Alphonse. He supposed it had to do with when his soul had been incased in amour.

"Have you ever just thought of telling him how you feel?"

"And have him laugh in my face, and gloat? Look at that men, I'm so damn amazing even the great FullMetal alchemist has fallen for my charm HAHAHA!"

"You never know Brother; he could very well feel the same way about you.

"Yeah right, Al. The man can have any woman he wants, probably any guy to, why would he want someone like me? I'm…I'm broken." The smaller blonde hung his head, trying to hold back fresh tears.

A heavy sigh escaped the younger boy's lips before he could stop it. Sometimes it was tiring trying to convince Ed just what a good person he really was.

"He may reject you Brother and he may not, my point is that you will never be able to move forward unless you get past this. You've never let anything stand in your way before."

"I never stood to have my heart broken before, Al."

"We all have to go through our first heart break."

"What is this?! I thought I was the big brother, shouldn't I be giving you the first broken heart speech?"

"Well, technically I'm the big brother."

"Holy shit Al," the older blonde stepped away and turned to face his brother, "did you just make a …short joke?"

"Yep!" A grin split the young mans face from ear to ear.

Twin laughter burst forth, filling the small room. The brothers laughed till tears were pouring from both of there eyes and they had to stop because they could no longer force enough oxygen into their systems.

"Damn Al that was the first time you have ever made a short joke at my expense."

"Oh come on it can't have been the first time."

"No really I think it was."

"Brother," Alphonse's tone turned serious again. "I really do think you should just come clean and tell General Mustang how you feel."

"I know Al, but…I just…I'm scared."

"Well, what would make you less afraid?"

"If I didn't have to do it."

"Brother! You're impossible!" Alphonse turned away; ready to leave this conversation where it was till an idea stuck him.

"You know, you could always do it a little at a time, that way it wouldn't seem so daunting."

"What do you mean Al?" Ed looked up at his brother as he sat down on their small couch that was really only a love seat, they didn't have room for anything else in the tiny apartment.

"I mean, talk to Mustang, and get to know him, let him get to know you. He doesn't have to know right away how you feel."

"But…won't he figure it out?"

"A man like Mustang? Probably. But that could work to you advantage."

"How so?"

"Well, if you take the first step and start "dating" so to speak and he figures it out and you keep dating then you will know he likes you back!"

"I don't know if it works like that Al, and who said anything about dating?"

"Isn't that basically what getting to know someone you like is? Just ask him to go to dinner with you, or hey we can go as a group. We used to do that all the time remember?"

"Yeah, but Mustang never went along. He didn't want to be seen fraternizing."

The taller Elric let out a large sigh and plopped his bigger frame down next to his brother. The couch gave a loud metal screech and the brothers looked at each other for a moment in trepidation.

Alphonse rubbed his temples for several long moments. _"This is getting frustrating." _He thought to himself as he peered of to his side where his brother sat, looking absolutely miserable. _"But it's worth it to see my brother happy again."_

"Brother, just plan on going out Friday night and I'll worry about the rest." Alphonse stood and smiled down at his brother noting that golden eyes had widened in surprise, and his mouth moved as if he was about to say something.

Before he even had a chance speak Al cut him to the chase. "You trust me right brother?" Alphonse did his best to look as cute as possible. _"Play the old "you trust me card", that'll get em' Al."_

Wide golden orbs softened, a small smile creasing the elders lips. "Of course I do, Al. I'll plan on going out Friday, ok?"

"Great! I set everything up don't you worry!" The younger Elric hurried of to the bedroom, closing the door behind him in what His older sibling thought was enthusiasm.

Once the door was closed and Alphonse was sure his brother wasn't going to follow him he let out a loud sigh. He picked his way through the books scattered all over the floor and sat on his bed.

Looking around the room he noticed just what an utter mess it was. The room was small and made even smaller by the two beds that occupied it, one on each side of the room. At the end of each bed was a desk, piled high with more books. On the opposite wall were book shelves, stuffed to the brim with even more books.

"_Were getting as bad as Schezka." (1) He_ thought to himself. A wry smile brightening his features for a moment. He sighed heavily again and rested his blonde head in his hands.

"_How am I going to pull this off?"_

A/N: (1) I don't know if I spelled her name right! I'd also like to thank everyone who has reviewed so far! Your kind words have really helped! And the more you guys do it the more I want to write! It's you who make it worth while! Also I suck at chapter titles.


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